McKell Quilter-Wilson is a friend of mine that I met through Instagram and she's honestly so ridiculously awesome. She started a series called 'Let's Talk Motherhood' where a group of mothers each month write a blog post about a specific topic and I am so privileged and excited to be able to be a part of the series for this month! We are talking about self care, and honestly this is probably one of the areas of motherhood that I struggle with the very most, so being able to talk about this is so refreshing and I am so excited to see what the other mothers in the series say about this topic! You can find the links to the other mother's blogs down below!
1. Has your view on self care changed since becoming a parent? If yes, how?
My view on self care has changed significantly. I've never been one to need to put on makeup, to do my hair, or even put on anything other than sweats. I've always been completely happy eating whatever I wanted, wearing what was comfy, and just kind of going with the flow. Since becoming a mother I've realized that you need to take time for yourself. You need to eat healthy and take care of your body. You know on an airplane when they say to put the oxygen mask on yourself before you put it on a child? It's the same idea. You need to take care of yourself before you can take care of another human being. You won't be able to give them nearly as much care if you're not first taken care of.
2. How do you make time for self care as a mom?
On days that I know it's going to be especially difficult because Jax didn't sleep very well, or I didn't, or the house is a mess I always try to wake up at least an hour before I expect Jax to. I need that time just to clean, or eat a good breakfast (or breakfast at all).
3. What are your favorite ways to practice self care?
Eating and putting on even the slightest bit of makeup. I don't know what it is, but I feel like I can conquer so much more if I put on makeup or do my hair at least a little bit. I feel good about myself and it makes it so much easier to be patient. Also, I've always had a tendency to just skip meals, and so if I can make an effort to actually make some meals for myself instead of just worrying about Jax eating then I really feel a difference.
4. How do you overcome 'mom guilt' when you do take a few minutes to yourself?
I struggle with this... a lot. I feel guilty when I can hear Jax crying but I just want to eat my meal while it's still hot, or when all of the dishes are dirty including his bottles and I spend that time putting makeup on or working out. I think about that oxygen mask analogy a lot. If I want to be patient and I want to be a better mother than I need to do what is important to myself. I've seen plenty of times that I lose my patience if I didn't get a chance to focus on myself that day, and it's just not worth it.
5. What advice would you give to moms that struggle with practicing self care?
You are still important. Believe it or not, you are more than just a mother. You are your own human being, and although it might seem like the other important human in your life is your child, it's not true. You are still a human being that needs to be taken care of. Whether it's working out, putting makeup on, or eating a meal that you actually prepared for yourself- do you. Your baby takes up the other 99% of your day, but give yourself that 1%. You deserve it.
This is something I've always struggled with, and even since having Jaxon it's only gotten so much worse for myself. I don't take time for myself, and when I do I feel extremely guilty for it, which is honestly ridiculous and when I say it out loud I realize how silly that really is. I could ramble on about this forever in both directions, I could easily justify not spending enough time for myself, but just as easily justify why it's important that I do!
Here are some other mom's blogs & Instagrams!
McKell, @mckellwilson, lifeasmrswilson.com
Aurora, @auroramccausland, auroramccausland.com
Rachel, @rachelguzik, momatwenty.wordpress.com
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