Let me start this out by telling you how much I absolutely love you. You were the first baby that I was blessed with earth side. You were my rainbow after the rain. You were, and you still are a complete miracle and the perfect addition to our family.
I think the hardest part of this transition that we're about to go through is the fact that you have no idea there is going to be anything different. In a few days your grandma is going to show up, and you will be so excited! You will think about how awesome it is that she is there to play with you and your favourite toys. She'll take you swimming and to the playground! You have no idea why she is there, you're just so happy that she is.
A few days after that we'll be dropping you off at your friend's house. You'll have so much fun! You'll play together all day. You'll eat lunch and dinner together! You can show each other all of the new things you've learned since the last time you guys played together. You might wonder where mom and dad are, but you'll be too distracted by all of the things you'll be doing that day to really think too hard about it.
Later that day, or maybe even the next day you'll come to a place you've been before. You've come here with mom and dad a couple of times. A strange lady put a strange thing on your moms' belly and you heard a strange thumping sound and it always made you concerned. This time, though, you won't be going to the same office. You'll go through doors you haven't been through before, and you'll see me in a way you've never seen me before. This will be the first time that you might think something is different. "Why is mom here?" You won't really care, you'll just be excited to see me. You'll climb onto the bed next to me and you'll try to climb on top of me, but you won't be able to. Something is in the way.
It's a baby. Remember how many times I've pointed to my belly and said, "baby brother?" Well, baby brother isn't my belly anymore. He's a real person. He's the reason grandma came to see you and play with you. He's the reason you didn't see mom and dad for a whole day while you played with your friend. And fair warning, he's the reason your entire life is about to change.
I wish I could explain this to you. I wish I could explain that I won't be able to get up and play with you whenever you want anymore, because I'll be feeding brother. I won't be able to catch you every time you try to throw yourself off of something. I won't be able to cuddle up with you for the entire day when you're not feeling well. I won't be able to make you my #1 priority anymore, and I am so sorry. I am so sorry I can't do any of those things anymore. I am so sorry that your brother needs more of my attention. I am so sorry that I can't sit you down and tell you that even though our day to day life is going to change, my love for you won't. I can't explain that to you, and I know that you'll have passing thoughts that that might be true. "Why does mom love brother more than me?" I don't. I love you both so much, and to be honest- right now, I can't even imagine that I will love brother as much as I love you, though I'm sure I will.
Things are going to be very hard for a while. I know that you're going to get frustrated and maybe even sad that we can't have the exact same relationship that we've had since you were born. I'm sad about it too.
But let me just tell you how amazing things are going to be in just a few months. Soon this little baby brother is going to start smiling and laughing, and you will do everything you can to make it happen. Eventually he'll sit up all by himself and you'll come and bring him all of your toys to try and get him to play with you, and eventually he will! A few months after that he'll be crawling around and you'll pretend he's chasing you and you'll run away laughing hysterically. Then he'll start to walk. You can show him all of your favourite places like the playground or the pool.
Things are about to get different, kid. Things are about to get scary. You are going to get frustrated and you are going to get sad. I am going to want to help you, but I can't. But in less than a week you are getting a new best friend. This boy will be a part of your life forever, and I promise that one day you'll look back on your life and you won't remember not having him. All of your memories of your childhood will have your brother in them. You probably won't even remember the days it was just you and me, and I'm okay with that, because I am so excited to see the relationship that you two develop.
Please never forget that I love you. Please never forget that you made me happier than I ever knew I could possibly be. You were everything I had hoped for, and more. Things are about to change, but the way I feel about you is only going to get stronger. I am only going to love you harder. Please be patient with me, please find a way to forgive me for all of the things you don't understand. Please give your brother a chance, because he is so excited to meet you.
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